Tag: motivation

Posted on

True Colors

God made no mistake when He made me. I am unique. There is only one me and there will only ever be one me. God gave me unique talents, gifts, abilities, looks, characteristics, and strengths to be used for His glory; and I am determined to carry out His purpose for my life. That someone else is succeeding doesn’t mean that I am failing. I can’t compare my life to that of someone else’s. We are all called to do different things at different times, according to God’s time table and planning. I can no longer allow someone to make me feel that I am something that I am not. I can no longer allow someone to make me feel lesser than I am. I can no longer allow someone to make me feel like I’m too shy, too quiet, not talented enough or not good enough to accomplish a dream. I cannot allow anyone (but God) to dictate my life for me. I cannot allow someone to make me believe that my dreams are unrealistic, impossible, or not meant for me.

Though other people may not know all that I have to offer, and though I may not even know all that I have to offer, all that truly matters is  what God knows. God knows my true colors and the potential masterpieces that can be created with them. God knows what he has placed on my heart; and I cannot and will not allow someone to strip that away for me. God will surely use me to do amazing works, In Jesus Name, Amen!

                          I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
                                                        your works are wonderful,
                                                               I know that full well.

                                                                       -Psalm 139:14

Posted on

It’s Alright

Is it alright to feel like you’re living in a shell of yourself?

Is it okay to feel like your place in the world is becoming more and more insignificant?

It’s like my self-esteem is completely shattered. And even though I continually try to search for the pieces and put them back together, it seems as though there will always be parts missing and fragile cracks will forever be present.

Maybe the issue is that my self-esteem was never really “whole.” It’s very hard to pretend like you’re okay on the outside, when on the inside you feel like you’re suffocating. However, confusingly enough, sometimes it’s easier just to fake it.  I can’t remember a time when I ever felt truly “alright.” Since childhood, I have let traumatic past experiences break my self-esteem to the point where it negatively impacts my present and seeps into my future. But I know that I can’t continue to let my past have such a negative hold on my life. I have to learn how to love myself, even with the missing pieces and visible cracks. I have to figure out how to truly be “alright.”

                                                       “Forget the former things;
                                                        do not dwell on the past.
                                                                   See, I am doing a new thing!
                                       Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
                                             I am making a way in the wilderness
                                                     and streams in the wasteland.

                                                                     – Isaiah 43:18-19

Posted on

Fill Me Up

God, thank you for your wisdom; thank you for your Spirit. Lord, help me to live a life that is pleasing to you. Let me be a true representation of a child of The Most High, Our Father, My Father. I want to live and walk in wisdom, along paths you have created and have desired that I venture on. Let my words, my thoughts, my actions, and my dreams be aligned and pleasing to You. Help me to be cautious and not foolish. Help me to understand You more and more, and understand Your will for my life.

Fill me up Lord, until I overflow; I want to run over. Fill me with Your Spirit and remove anything and everything in me that will get in the way of that. I want to know You more. I want to feel You more. Help me to be strong enough in You that I’m able to fearlessly make the most of every opportunity to spread Your word, message, grace, love, forgiveness, favor, acceptance, and so much more to anyone and everyone I encounter. This world and this flesh is filled with so much evil; help me to combat that in whichever way You desire me to. I want to be a source of light in the darkness. I want to be a light that leads others to The Light that shines brighter than all – The Eternal Light.

I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love.

                                                                                – Ephesians 3:16-17

Posted on

Read All About It

Trying to live is exhausting sometimes…to be honest, a lot of times. And I hate that I have to “try” to live, but that’s exactly what it feels like I’m doing. Living doesn’t feel natural or effortless. It feels like I have to exert so much energy just “to live” that I end up feeling like I’m dying. I’m really not living at all; I’m just existing. Day after day goes by and I feel like each day has been wasted. I wonder what was the point of waking up that morning and existing in a world that I don’t even really feel a part of.

On a regular basis, questions race through my head like: “What did I do today that had any meaning?” “What steps did I make today towards living out my purpose?” “Do I even know what my purpose is?” “Do I even have a purpose?” And my spirit is further disturbed with crazy thoughts like: “God has to be disappointed with me.” “God can’t keep forgiving me.” “I don’t deserve God’s love.” And I said “crazy” thoughts, because I know deep down inside God doesn’t view me in the negative way I view myself. I know that God loves me even when I find it hard to love myself. I know that as long as I repent, God will continually forgive. I know that I have a purpose. I know that my life has meaning. I know all these things because it’s all written in His word, and His word is the truth. I just have to allow myself to wholeheartedly accept it all – His word, His love, His forgiveness, His purpose for my life.

I’ve come to the point where I’m simply just tired. I’m tired spiritually, emotionally, physically, and mentally. I’m tired of just merely existing; I want to live and live freely and authentically. And I know that there’s a lot of “stuff” I have to deal with in order to achieve that authentic freedom.

Since I was a child, I’ve always been known to be quiet and would never really talk; but, when I was little, I discovered that I could have a voice through writing. As I share my thoughts, feelings, and experiences on this blog for anyone and everyone to read all about it, I hope that I begin to find and strengthen my voice and myself. For pretty much as long as I can remember, I have let my past and just the different circumstances of life silence me and keep me from truly living. I’m praying that this blog will serve as a source of healing and breakthrough not only for me but for anyone else who may come across it.

   The word of the Lord came to me, saying,

   “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,
    before you were born I set you apart;
    I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.”

     – Jeremiah 1:4-5